Intimacy: a very interesting and scary word at the same time.
But what does it mean exactly? Have you ever dated someone and they told you, you’re lacking in it? I’ve been on both ends of the spectrum. I’ve dished it, and just recently it’s been dished to me…
Intimacy to me, is the surrendering of ego and fear to another person. This means leaving all of your vulnerabilities at the door, and connecting on a deeper emotional level. To me, this is not done in a total of 8 hours over the course of 3 dates. THIS happens over a gradual time period.
Apparently, to others, and ‘others’ I guess I mean those who feel comfortable quickly (so NOT me) it is supposed to happen on a specific time frame (THEIR time frame in fact). When it doesn’t, the sensitive person is left feeling that because they aren’t on the EXPRESS TRAIN, there could be something wrong with them.
If there’s anything I’ve learned in this world so far, it’s that I CAN NOT and WILL NOT sacrifice who I am for other people. So looks like I got on the wrong train, AGAIN. Intimacy is scary, we are all very aware. But I try not to let fear dictate my life, and would continue to move forward on a pace I feel the most comfortable.
So, sorry, NOT SORRY, for wanting to get to know someone before opening my sensitive heart to another. Being a highly sensitive individual is both a gift and a curse, BEAR WITH US PLEASE.