The 2 Most Important Things to Ask Yourself in a Relationship
I know what you’re thinking. How does the woman who has had several relationships know what’s healthy and what’s not? Well, I’ll be the first to tell you, I’m no expert. What I can call myself an expert on is identifying and honoring my feelings. So with that little bit of knowledge, I bring you my thoughts on the serious questions you need to ask in your relationship.
How does this person make you feel?
Yes, you are very fond of this person. You may even love them already. That is undeniable. But really ask yourself, regardless of how you feel about them, how do they make you feel? Does this person make you feel alone? Under-valued? Used? Do you find yourself more upset then happy? Really try to identify these feelings. If they make you happy, be conscious of WHEN they make you happy. Is it when they buy you things? Is it only when they feed your ego?
Does loving this person contradict my highest good?
Let me clarify this one. Choosing love is never the wrong path. EVER. I am a big advocate for choosing love in every situation. HOWEVER, choosing love does not mean sacrificing yourself. You can choose to love from afar and out of a relationship with someone. If being in a relationship with someone involves living a lifestyle you are not okay with, then it is OKAY to choose to not be a part of it, NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU LOVE THEM. A good exercise for this is to look in the mirror and ask yourself “Do I like the type of person I am while I am participating in this relationship? Do they bring out the best in me? Does this person cause me to act like someone other than myself?” If the answer is no, then you may want to re-evaluate.
Having a healthy relationship is so important to living a beautiful life. Hopefully these truths help bring you clarity in a relationship you have doubts about. Identifying how you feel is only half the battle. All I ask is that you be honest about how you truly feel. Follow that advice and healthy relationships will be a constant in your life.